Trend watch:

Today, we bring you the first installment in a one-part series: Trendwatch -- Denmark.

Trend 1) Over the past couple of weeks, as I've dutifully gone about my business and pulled long(ish) hours in the library and computer lab to finish up all my work, I've been privy to the most intimate secrets of many of my classmates -- and usually without their knowledge. Whilst typing away feverishly on some busywork that is even busier than the last, I'd often overhear conversations about sensitive subject matter. Perhaps "overhear" is the wrong word, as these conversations are so loud and conspicuous that it would be impossible not to hear -- "be subjected to" is probably a better term. Plus, we all know my hearing ain't always up to par, so I'm not really prone to auditory snooping into my peers' private lives.

Countless times, girls (it was usually girls) would walk in, talking on the phone or to a friend, and ramble on to the world about kicking a guy out of bed in the morning, breaking up with their boyfriends, or how many shots they ripped over the weekend. Now, I'm not condemning any of these activities, but perhaps I am somewhat Puritan in that I think they're probably best discussed in private. Or perhaps not even in private. Anyone who has read this blog faithfully over the past couple of months knows that I do not mince words when it comes to my own extracurricular activities or personal shortcomings, but I do it on my own terms. What I take issue with is blathering on in public with no thought to who might overhear and how one's discussion might poorly reflect on oneself.

Or maybe that's it -- that they are consciously broadcasting these things. Numerous commentators (and parents) have mentioned the exhibitionist tendencies of Generation Y, and how with our Facebook, MySpace, and other social media we make our private lives public to the world. Parents cringe with the thought of incriminating photos of their children appearing online, but in many cases, they are posted by the kids themselves. For whatever reason, Generation Y seems to have none of the qualms about privacy of previous generations, and we seem to make every attempt to cast ourselves into the pale-blue-limelight of our peers' computer screens. Whether this behavior springs from our obsession with celebrity or solely from the ubiquity of social networking technologies, I do not know, but for whatever reason, we have few fears about our personal information becoming public. In fact, we encourage it.

So perhaps these conversations about pillow talk and hangovers are less a result of ignorance of one's surroundings and more because of one's surroundings. I've often cynically wondered whether announcements of failed relationships and emotional anguish are actually just spoken personal ads, brilliantly placed to attract just the right mix of suitors. We all know that people often talk up their weekends in the hope of seeming cooler, more exciting, or more daring than they really are -- I fall victim to it myself from time to time -- so I guess it makes sense that the lines between what is normal public boasting and personal, private behaviors are being blurred. While it would be impossible to make a determination of whether idle banter in a random computer lab is intentional or not, I'm willing to wager that some is. I can only hope that my peers become a little more aware that others might overhear their discussion of last night's sexcapades, but if it is intentional, then a message to all you ladies out there: Single? Duly noted.

Trend 2) Two times in the past week, while waiting for the bus for the umpteenth time, I've been standing in the vicinity of a Muslim woman, speaking wildly in Arabic to no one in particular. At first I've been curious, then confused, and then uncomfortable, hoping the crazy person doesn't come sit next to me when the bus does arrive. But then, inevitably, they turn around to watch a biker pass or check the timetable, and I realize: they're talking on a cell phone. Obviously loud cell phone conversations are nothing new, and even those dorky headset phone are becoming more popular, so I shouldn't have been surprised to see someone talking loudly, apparently to no one.

The subtle difference in this situation was that the women weren't wearing headsets, but instead had snugly secured their phones up against their ears by shoving them in their headscarves. What a novel idea indeed. So while it might still seem odd, it is a purely functional wardrobe adaptation, and a definite trend.

The competing cultures in the equation make for a hilarious comparison, however. The cell phone -- one of the hallmarks of today's modern, western culture -- being enabled by a symbol of religion and conservatism that preaches against the very excesses that a cell phone represents. Now, in the hope of curtailing any perceived ignorance, of course I know that mainstream Muslims have no problem with the West, technology, etc. -- but still, it's the symbolism I'm getting at. It's just funny to see women who shun western fashion in favor of traditional religious dress choosing to integrate in other ways. One can only think that it won't be long before these cultures merge completely, as cell phone conversations are far more conducive to chatting than to reciting Koranic verse. But hey, maybe we're there already -- after all, I don't speak Arabic. For all I know, those animated cell phone conversations that I witnessed actually translated to, "Oh my Muhammed, you will not believe how many shots I ripped last night. And Ahmed is such a dick."


Author's note: After just writing in detail about how careless my generation seems to be in presenting itself, it must seem particularly ironic that I engage in such lazy, insensitive religious humor to an audience that consists of, in theory, the entire interconnected world. However, as I mentioned earlier, I do it on my own terms (plus, I qualify it afterwards with fun, official-sounding things like "author's notes"). But wouldn't it be funny -- and telling -- if I set off a religious uproar in the same country that infuriated the Muslim world by publishing cartoons of the prophet Muhammed? I know I'd get a kick out of that, followed by a fatwa, most likely.